Families are Forever

Dear Max,
Last Sunday you were asked to stand up in Primary today and tell about your family and share something that you like to do with your family.  I had heard that some kids had brought small pictures that were hard for the kids to see, so I went and had a 8x10 printed of our family at Disney Land, including Tova.  Friday I started talking to you about how on Sunday you are going to get up and talk about our family, tell who is in our family and something we like to do together, I could barely get my sentence out and you are telling me..."Mom, I got this, I got this!" and didn't want any further instruction from me.  We practiced Saturday evening and again Sunday before church, and you had it down.  Each time we practiced, you held up the picture of our family, and Said, "My name is Max, this is my family, my daddy, mommy, Bentley and my sister Tova from Sweeden.  I like to play Jenga with my family" PERFECT!  Well, we get to church and the nerves set in.  You're telling me how you don't want to go up there anymore!  WHAT?!?!?  I'm giving you words of encouragement, reminding you how confident you are and that you got this!  It was time for you to get up, Dad and I proudly sitting in the back, silently cheering you on.  Your sweet primary teacher, Sister Fox came up with you to stand by for moral support.  And then you began..."My name is Max" (perfect, so far so good!) you held up the picture of our family and then it began...the rest of your talk.  "You should listen to your mommy, be careful and hold her hand when you cross the street, she wants you to be safe and careful. Don't fight with your brothers and be confident!  In the name of Jesus Christ Amen!" Then Sister Bott says, can you tell us who is in your family?  "Yup, my mommy, daddy, Bentley and me!" And you sat down!  It was awesome.  You were so proud of yourself and you did such a great job!  I guess our family is all about mommy giving you advice and direction...so that is what you told them.  I'm so very grateful that "you got this!" and that we are a forever family.  I'm so proud of you for getting up there today and telling about our family!  You make me smile every moment of every day!  I love you Max!

Love,

Mommy

The "binder" helps me remember...

Dear Max -
What a joy being your mother is.  I decided that I need to pull out your binder from the hospital at least once a week and reread the medical journal that was kept by your doctors when you were born.  I'm grateful to have these writings documenting the 19 days prior to Daddy and I getting there.  Those 19 days of fighting you did.  My mind fills with millions of thoughts on the different outcomes that could have taken place, the "what ifs" all the decisions that were made, who made them and who didn't make them.  It's hard not to let my mind go to what feels like the millions of different outcomes that could have been.  But then my soul fills with peace, because all is exactly the way it was intended, you are here to be our son.  I don't pull this binder out often enough, only really when we are going to see a new doctor so they will have a full scope of your life.  And today we went to see Dr. Maller, she is a neurology specialist.  Don't get too ahead of yourself, we didn't go get your "brain" checked out cause your crazy...that is not a neurological issue, that's a "Max" issue!  We went on the orders of Dr. Downey because your still walking up on your toes, which can be anything from a habit to a neurological or developmental issue.  All went well at Dr. Maller's, it's nothing neurological or developmental, it is all in habit.  She suggested some hightop shoes, which I'm sure you will hate!  Because the other reason we went to see her is to discuss your sensitive feet.  She assured us that you definitely have sensitive feet, but to work with you on this by not giving in to your requests for no shoes or socks.  We must "power through"!  I suggested she come and hang out with you in the mornings when were getting ready and see how Dr. Maller feels about "powering through"!  She said to Daddy and I how very proud she is of the young boy you are growing into.  She said that given the rough start that you had, you are a well adjusted and behaved child!  Way to go Max!!  Well, after all this the take away for me...take out the binder more often!  In moments of frustration and weakness, it's a great reminder that we can do hard things as a family!  I love you Max!

Love,
Mom

I'm Sorry...

Dear Max -
I must first and foremost apologize for not writing you for so long!  It's hard to believe it has been 3 years since I've written, the time has truly gone so fast.  I'll try to fill in the gaps as we go.  I started reading different entries to you the other day and the joy on your face seeing "baby max" and hearing my thoughts was just the reminder I needed that not a moment more can pass by without putting the words down to look back on.  I promise to do better and to keep you up to date as best as I can!  Remember, mommy isn't perfect and this is a great example of that!  I love you Max, and I love that you love hearing my words.

Love,
Mom

Disney Land

Dear Max,
Its always a great day in Disney Land!  And today was no exception.  I'm exhausted and I'm not sure if walking again will ever be in my future.  So this is only our 2nd time with you at Disney Land without a stroller, all other trips have included the stroller and Disney Land with no stroller is a lot of fun.  However, the last time was a tad stressful because your at that stage where you are not going to just walk right by us and hold our hands, and we understand that.  But your not old enough to be on your own.  So I had a great solution...I decided to write our cell phone number on your stomach, and then told you if you ever lost us during the day to find the people with a Mickey Mouse name tag and tell them you can't find your mommy and daddy and then lift up your shirt and show them our cell phone number.  I'm pretty sure you think we are crazy?  Right!  We probably are.  I'm pretty sure Tova thinks were nuts!  She was laughing when Dad had you laying on the bed in the hotel room while he's writing our number on you with a ball point pen.  But hey!  Better safe than sorry!

Life it just more magical in Disney Land.  A couple of note worthy moments from my eyes today...I've always wanted to go see the Disney Junior stage show, we've always seemed to miss it during our past trips, but this time we made time for it. It was a stage show with all your favorite shows, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Sophia the First and Jake and the Never land Pirates.  Seriously, I don't know what it is, but seeing these things through your eyes, it seriously brings tears into my eyes.  Daddy sat on the floor with you and Tova and I sat in the back on a bench.  I'm so glad I got to watch the show while watching you.  To see your face light up when the characters come to the stage, and to watch you be a part of the show it awesome.  At one point they had all the kids say magic words to try to get it to snow, and when you all said it they made it start snowing.  I'm not kidding, when I looked at the excitement on your face that you thought you made it snow...I started to tear up!  I'm such a weepy mom!  The other difference on this trip...you were scared of EVERY ride.  We were in Disney Land last June and you went on EVERYTHING!  Hollywood Tower of Terror, Space Mountain, Soaring over California.  Everything and love the rides.  So I thought it was a great idea to take you on Splash Mountain.  You had enjoyed the big rides so much last time, why wouldn't you like them this time...Well, I may have ruined you.  When I saw this picture, it said it all!  I figured, your tall enough, it's a fun ride...you'll love it!  Nope, the question after every ride became.  "Mom, does this ride have a big waterfall?  If it does, I don't want to go on it!"

Well, you survived Splash Mountain and when I say you, I mean you...just you...your shirt, shoes, pants, jacket and underware did not.  You were soaked!  So the rest of the day you spent in your new Monsters University Jammies and Disney Land Unders!  LUCKY!!  You are the funnest kid to be around, most of the time...you did get tired during the day and Daddy was able to get you to fall asleep for a quick nap which was great to keep you energized for the evening.  We met up with our friend Brian for dinner and then watched the fireworks.  I could really go anywhere with you Max, but Disney Land is always a Magical day together!  I love you!


Love,


Mom

It's a SURRRRR....PRISE!!

Dear Max -
Well, the birthday trip that never was, finally is!!  We had planned to go to Disneyland and Universal Studios for your 5th birthday.  Hotels were booked, day's were taken off all was in place...then....we found a house in the neighborhood we had been looking and moved!  The day's that were taken off, were spent getting settled in the new place, and the trip was cancelled.  Maybe a better word is postponed.

We decided not to let you in on the small detail that we were going to California.  Daddy, you and Tova met up with our niece Camri and her two adorable kids, Lexi and Knox at the Container Park.  Camri and Tracy had come into town from northern Utah for the weekend, and we are so glad that you had the opportunity to meet up and play with your cousins on the Trenholm side!  Truly that was enough fun for you!  After leaving the park, Daddy, you and Tova headed over to pick me up from work, by the time you guys got to me you were fast asleep!  That makes it really easy to keep a secret, when your not getting a million questions!

We got a little more than 1/2 way there and you woke up, surprised that we were still in the car, slightly confused as to why we were still in the car and then came the million questions.  We were able to appease

your desire for the truth by simply telling you that we were trying to find Papa to give him Grammie's purse, and I lifted up my small travel purse that Grammie has one just like.  You took that for the truth, and away we went.  You are too smart for us, because pretty soon you were requesting that we call Papa and find out where he is and then we will drive to him, instead of just driving to drive.  Insisting that this happen because our Papa is a tricky Papa and we may never find him.  Well, I pull out my phone to call and with the glow of my cell phone you see that the purse is green not yellow and I thought for sure we were done!  "This is not Grammie's purse!  Hers is wellow (not a misspelling, that's how your pronounce it) and this is green" a simple "Oh no! Now what are we going to do?? I grabbed the wrong bag!!!"  By this time we were almost to the hotel so Dad simply said, it's too late to drive back home now, so let's just get a hotel and we will drive home in the morning!  This was a brilliant tactic because you went to sleep the easiest you EVER have when traveling to Disneyland.  When their was no excitement of what was to come the next morning it was fast asleep for you!  I love you Max and can't wait to see your surprised face in the morning!  Now, let's hope I can sleep!!

Love,

Mom